Friday, July 8, 2022

Prime Day is too good at making me want stuff I don't need

Every year I buy multiple Amazon Smart plugs during the yearly shopping bacchanalia known as Amazon Prime Day. This is different than Black Friday, which Amazon now also kind of owns, in that the weather outside my window is usually 30 degrees warmer and I'm thinking more about the beach than work.

I do not need all those smart plugs and have them stacked up in my closet as I struggle to figure out which plugs in my house ought to be smarter (usually not that many). I buy them, though, because I can't resist a good deal (really, can any of us).

Even before Prime Day officially kicks off on July 12 and 13, the darn plugs are already almost half off, and I'm struggling to control myself. That's really the tale of my Amazon Prime Day experience: me knifing to the depths of Amazon.com in search of amazing  – sometimes lightning – deals on things I simply don't need.

My other goto Prime Day product category is storage devices. I buy micro-SD and standard SD cards by the bunches. Sometimes I jump at a portable SSD drive, because who wouldn't want 17% or more off a 1TB drive? I don't need more external storage, but how can I resist?

Recently, I purchased a new oven with a built-in air fryer, which means I don't need a countertop version. And yet I find myself two clicks away from purchasing a KOOC XL large Air Fryer because it's 53% off. That's an incredible deal. Why shouldn't I buy it? Because I literally don't need it. But I can get it in red! No. I have to stop.

Stopping is impossible when there's a single destination filled with so many sales. If Amazon were a physical shipping center it would be like 10,000 Macy's Basements or Costcos stacked on top of each other, with chutes built into the top floor so you could jump in and slide down, exiting on any floor you want.

I stumbled on an LG 55-inch 4K OLED that's 27% off. It looks lovely. I don't have a room to put it in and there's nothing wrong with my current TVs...but that's such a good deal. I bet if I asked Alexa - which is built into that TV - it would tell me to buy it. Alexa might also be biased.

You know I could get a nearly 4-feet deep oval pool for $619? That's a 36% savings on something I absolutely do not need in my backyard, but when will it be this cheap again?

I spend so much time on Amazon looking for things I don't need that sometimes I smell a deal before I see it - or maybe I imagine I do. This "Bacon is my favorite language" blanket is not only a true statement, but it's 60% off. There is no place in my home for this rather ugly bit of fabric and thread, but I still feel its tug.

In this case, it's a matter of threshold. Any deal that 60% off or more is instantly as compelling as a freshly baked apple pie. I cannot help but consider it. Come to think of it, the perfect Amazon Prime Day site for me is the part that organizes deals by the scale of the sale. I don't care what it is, if it's even just 50% or more off, I will consider it.

This is where I found this nifty Milk Frother that, from the look of the photo, should be renamed "Milk Splasher." Still, at $14.39. I think this handheld device would make a nice addition to my new kitchen. Never mind the fact that I don't drink cappuccinos or lattes. I just think I need...er...want it.

Ultimately, I'm powerless against the siren song of a great deal. Amazon Prime Day is nothing but. So what if it's for a lot of stuff I don't need? Sometimes want is enough, right?

If you're looking for some amazing Amazon Prime Day Deals and have the same lack of control as me, start with this list:



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